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Friday, September 13, 2019

Just Say No Candle Spell

Just Say No Candle Spell

Telling people no is one of the things I struggle with, and I know I'm not the only one. Part of it comes from being a people-pleaser, as many Libras are. I enjoy making others happy, and I'm also extremely competitive, so when I see an opportunity to get ahead, I often jump on it, even if it isn't something I can actually manage at the time. This simple spell is designed to help you find your voice and say no when you need to. No in and of itself is some pretty powerful magic and knowing when to say no is freeing. You are not obligated, at any point, to say yes to anyone, especially if you are already hesitant to do so.

What You'll Need

  • Blue candle
  • Black candle
  • Sodalite
  • Black Tourmaline
  • Two strips of paper
  • Pen
  • Firesafe dish
Just Say No Candle Spell


What to Do

This spell can be performed on the Full or New Moon.

As always, feel free to cleanse your items and charge them if you feel inclined. You may also cast a circle, call quarters, and ask for any divine assistance before beginning this spell. I didn't do any of these for this particular spell, except cleansing the items before use.

When you are ready, sit the blue candle on the left and the black candle on the right. Light both candles at the same time. While the candles are burning, hold the sodalite in your hand and begin charging it with your intent: to increase truthful communication. Once you see it filling with blue light or it feels warm in your hand, place it in front of the blue candle. Next charge the black tourmaline with your intent: to banish your inability to say no when you need to. Note that I didn't say banish your ability to say no all the time. Saying you want to banish all unwillingness to say no all the time is potentially dangerous. Instead, you want to only say no when you need and should to keep you safe and well. When you see it filling with black light or it feels warm in your hand, place it in front of the black candle.

Just Say No Candle Spell

Next, on one strip of paper write what you want to do: Increase communication. Phrase your intent in a positive light such as "I will communicate my true feelings" or "I will openly communicate with others and say no when needed." On the next strip of paper, write what you are wishing to get rid of: you inability to say no when you need to. Again, phrase this in a positive light. "I banish my inability to say no when I should" or "I banish my inability to communicate truthfully when needed."

Just Say No Candle Spell

Finally, burn the first strip of paper about open communication in the blue candle flame and the banishment strip of paper in the black candle. As they burn, see yourself standing tall and telling others no when they ask too much of you or you are unable to fulfill the task they wish you to complete. Say aloud,
"I will openly communicate with others and banish my inability to speak truthfully and say no when needed. This is true until I ask for it to be undone. And so it is."
And that's it! You can allow the candles to burn down the strengthen the spell or snuff them out if you are short on time. Dispose of the ashes by strewing them into the wind and leave your crystals sitting out on your altar for a week or two to help remind you of your intent.

Just Say No Candle Spell

Why You Did It


Candles can be used in some of the most powerful spells, and are pretty cheap to acquire. For this spell, I went with blue and black because the spell is about communication and banishment. Blue is the color of communication as in the wind that brings messages. I'm sure you have heard the whispers carried on the first cool breeze of Fall or the first warm breeze of Spring, celebrating the changing seasons. Black is the color of banishment as it is the absence of all light. It is the ultimate remover.

Our crystals correspond with the candle color. Sodalite, being blue, is a crystal of communication. It also promotes truth and harmony, both aspects we need if we wish to openly communicate our feelings with others and say no when we need to. Black tourmaline is grounding and protective, as well as a great stone for banishment. It helps remove roadblocks that keep you from your best interest, and therefore a great crystal to use in this particular spell.

Just Say No Candle Spell

The intentions were written and burned to help release our intentions into the universe through smoke, which is representative of the element Air, and then the ashes disposed of using the wind (also element Air) to further communicate our message. Air is the element of communication and by burning and throwing your ashes into the wind, it will help carry it to the spirits that will be helping you on your journey

To break this spell, light a single white candle and say,
"I no longer wish to communicate openly with others. I ask that the spell be removed. And so it is."
And, as always, remember to record your spell in your Book of Shadows or use my spell/ritual worksheet to keep track of the spell.

What do you do to help you say no? Any nonmagical tips and tricks? Please comment below!

Monday, September 9, 2019

September Full Moon Worksheet

September Full Moon Worksheet

This month's full moon is in Pisces in the early morning of September 14th, meaning you can totally celebrate it on Friday the 13th! Spooky! Emotions may run high, as Pisces is a water sign, but this month's Full Moon should bring about the culmination of all your hard work over the past 6 months. This moon is considered the Harvest Moon, the moon closest to Mabon. The moon is known for illuminating the harvest and as such will illuminate all your hard work and the fruits of that labor. Be aware that people may be slightly more sensitive over the next two weeks, and approach situations with gentleness, kindness, and patience. This month's worksheet contains a five-card tarot spread to illuminate how things are changing for you and what effects that will have on everyone. As always there are also sections for what you want to release and charge, and any intuitive thoughts you receive during the Full Moon.

September Full Moon Worksheet

CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE COPY

Looking for more free worksheets? Why not get your free copy of my spell/ritual worksheet to write your best spells and rituals yet?

Thursday, September 5, 2019

Reader Request: Womanhood Initiation Ritual

Womanhood Initiation Ritual

Earlier this week I asked my readers what they wanted me to write about. I have some of my usual posts lined up for later in the month, but wanted to know what you witches really wanted from me. I got answers and ideas across the board, and promise I will cover as many of them as I possibly can. Some may take a little longer to answer, like the person waiting since January for me to post about office magic, but I promise, I am getting there. Haha!

So the first post I want to cover because it seems the most time-sensitive comes from a reader via Facebook: "Humm.. what am I about to pick up I need help with... initiation rituals. I need something for a serious, not tv stupid menarche party for my Tinkerbutton. I've got her fabric pads. I've got her a tree of life necklace, we've had loads of talks! Now I'm just waiting for aunt flow to show! Lol"

What a wonderful suggestion! After doing a bit of research, and I mean deep digging research, there isn't a whole lot available for women regarding initiation rituals. The whole "Period Party" is as close to modern initiation into womanhood as we currently get, and it's pretty exclusionary as not all women have periods! Because of this, I wanted to write an initiation ritual that all women could use, whether it be when they start their period, when they turn 16, have their first baby, or transition. I didn't want to leave anyone out. Simone de Beauvoir said in best in The Second Sex, "One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman."

This particular ritual is best performed on the Full Moon when the Divine Feminine is strongest, but any important day will work as your Divine Feminine is strongest within yourself. So if your period begins in the middle of the Waxing Moon, go with it. Your official transition date is the New Moon? Do it! Pick a day that works best for you.

What You'll Need

  • white veil or shroud
  • table to sit objects on
  • red candle
  • lighter/matches
  • a bowl of purified water with a pinch of salt
  • red apple
  • knife/athame
  • a chalice of red wine or juice

What to Do

This ritual is best completed with at least 2 people but can be modified to do alone, on the Full Moon or any other special occasion. Begin by cleansing, charging, and/or blessing your items. Whatever method you chose is up to you. Personally, my go-to is always sage, because I have a ton of it. I also really enjoy blowing on an object and imagining all the residual energy blowing away with it. Prior to the ritual whoever is being initiated should take a purifying bath or shower. Once cleansed, they should either dress in all white or wear at least a white veil or shroud for the beginning of the ritual.

Womanhood Initiation Ritual

When ready, lay out the objects on the table with the candle at the top center, the bowl of water to the left, the chalice of red wine/juice to the right, and the apple in front of the candle. Then create sacred space in whatever way you wish. Feel free to cast a circle and call quarters, but do not invoke any deities at this stage. Skip that step for now. Once sacred space has been established light the red candle and invoke the goddess Artemis by saying,

"With this red candle, I ask Artemis, Goddess of Sovereignty and Young Women, to join our ritual to bless this young woman as she transitions into womanhood of her own volition. May you watch over us all and bring strength and courage as we march forward into the future."

This can be said by the initiator if working with more than one person or by the initiate if alone. Next, bless the water. The initiator should hold their hands over the bowl and say,

"I bless this water in the name of Artemis, Divine Huntress and Protector of Young Women. May it be cleansed and purified in Her name."

Dip 2 fingers into the blessed water and place your fingers on the initiate's forehead. The veil or shroud should still be covering their face at this time. Say,

"With this water, I cleanse and purify [insert name here] before me. May she be blessed by Artemis as she transitions from a child into womanhood."

Next, have the initiate pick up the knife and apple. Then the initiator says,

"The blade symbolizes the last roadblock between [insert name] and womanhood. The apple represents the Divine Feminine, the Forbidden Fruit, the life-giving gift of women. By cutting through the apple, [insert name] will make the final transition into womanhood."

The initiate should then cut the apple in half while saying,

"I break the chains of childhood and recognize that now I am a woman. I accept my Divine Feminine and vow to honor her daily. I will allow no one, including myself, to devalue me. I will stand tall as I walk this path and ask that Artemis continue to bless me in the future."

Womanhood Initiation Ritual

Lift the veil and allow the initiate to take a bite from one half of the apple. The other half should be given to Artemis as an offering. Next, the initiator should dip 2 fingers into the red wine and place them on the initiates forehead, now uncovered, and say,

"With this red wine, I anoint [insert name] with the life-giving gift of women. May it spark creativity, strength, and perseverance."

Finally, snuff out the candle and say,

"We thank you, Artemis, for your grace and protection during this initiation ritual for [insert name]."

Remove the sacred space and go party! This is a time to celebrate!

Why You Did It

For this spell, I drew heavily on mythological representations of women from the red candle to the red apple to the chalice of red wine/juice. Let's begin with the veil. Veils are commonly used to represent a transition from one life to another. During a wedding ceremony, the white veil represents purity prior to the transition into marriage. In the case of this ritual, it means the same thing, but not in a patriarchal sense. Children, by definition, are pure beings. The veil represents that purity, not that it suddenly goes away when one becomes a woman, but instead, it changes form, which is represented by the lifting of the veil. The lifting symbolizes the transition from childhood to womanhood.

Next, we have the red candle. Candles, in general, attract spirits and deities which is why there is a candle in the first place. It's red to symbolize blood or menstruation. I mentioned in the introduction, however, that just because a woman doesn't menstruate, it doesn't mean she is less of a woman. The candle allows us to symbolically represent blood and menstruation, the life-giver of all animals, even if the soon-to-be-woman is not menstruating or cannot menstruate.

If you have been following my blog for any period of time, you know that I don't believe in any deities, but I felt compelled to include Artemis into this ritual based on her mythology alone. One of the most famous initiation rituals for young women involved the Cult of Artemis at Bruaron. Furthermore, Artemis is said to rule over all biological transitions of women, from before puberty to the first childbirth, which makes her the perfect goddess to invoke when we are talking about initiation into womanhood.

Next, we have the blessed water, later followed by the red wine/juice. The blessed water acts as a final purifier before the transition into womanhood. At the same time, it blesses the soon-to-be-woman with the blessing of Artemis. The now woman is finally touched with the red wine/juice, which also symbolizes menstruation and the life-giving properties of blood. This is the finally blessing of Artemis and is meant to infuse the now woman with a "woman's life force." Women, by nature, have the ability to bring forth life, but that doesn't always mean bringing about a child. It also means creating artwork, poetry, businesses, and the like. Basically, anything that involves the act of creating. The water and red wine/juice are presented in a bowl and chalice respectively, again symbolizing the "womb" or life-giver, even if you don't physically have one, you still have a location for creation. Both of these were touched to the forehead or third-eye to awake the innate Divine Feminine all women possess.

And finally, we have the red apple, the ultimate symbol of womanhood in my opinion. Again, the red symbolizes blood and the shape of an apple conveys the womb, but it is the Biblical tale of the apple that resonates with me. I don't care what your current beliefs are, the story of Eve plucking an apple from the Tree of Knowledge is known around the world, and still holds sway within the witch community. Eve taking a bite of that apple was the ultimate act of rebellion; it was her initiation into womanhood, despite the Bible framing it as a sinful act that led to the downfall of man. Screw that! It was a woman taking possession of her Divine Feminine. The act of slicing and biting into the apple recreates this act of rebellion, solidifying the transition into womanhood. I knew the moment I was asked to write a womanhood initiation that I had to include the famous apple as the final act. There was no avoiding it.

Unfortunately, this is not a spell you break. However, you can choose to no longer recognize the initiation. Simply light a black candle, thank Artemis for her grace, and let her know you no longer wish to recognize the initiation. Make sure you leave Artemis an offering when finished. And, as always, remember to record your spell in your Book of Shadows or use my spell/ritual worksheet to keep track of the spell.

Have you been initiated into something before? How about womanhood? Share your stories in the comments below, and if you tried this ritual yourself, I would love to hear how it went!

Monday, September 2, 2019

Apothecary: Yarrow Salve

Apothecary: Yarrow Salve

This year, my yarrow has grown and bloomed multiple times. I actually have three different types in my yard: pomegranate, yellow, and white. All of them are beautiful and the white yarrow in the backyard has started growing outside of the planter, which is totally fine with me, although the guy that mows my lawn mows right over it. Oh well!

Yarrow can be used for a variety of medicinal purposes, but today we are going to focus on how to make a yarrow salve. This salve is perfect for cuts, scrapes, bruises, bug bites and stings. Do not use this salve for burns as the oil will trap the heat.

Yarrow Salve

Ingredients
1 1/2 cups olive oil
2 cups yarrow leaves and flowers, roughly chopped
1/4 cup beeswax pellets (more if you want to produce a thicker salve)

Directions
Begin by gathering and cleaning your yarrow. Be sure not to confuse yarrow with hemlock, which looks very similar. Here is a great video helping you identify each plant. If you are unsure of what you are picking, order some yarrow online instead. Once the yarrow is dry, remove the stems and flowers and roughly chop. Place the chopped yarrow in an airtight container and cover the yarrow with olive oil. It should take around 1 to 1 1/2 cups to completely cover the yarrow. Seal the container and allow to infuse in a cool, dark place for about four weeks (1 month). This is a great salve to begin on the New or Full Moon.

After the mixture has infused for at least four weeks, strain the leaves and flowers from the oil into a saucepan. Add the beeswax and heat the liquid until the beeswax completely melts. Once completely combined,  pour the oil mixture into a sturdy salve container. I prefer glass as the plastic chemicals are not able to infiltrate the mixture if you use glass. However, if you go with plastic, choose a container with sturdy, thick sides, as the plastic will melt when you had the hot oil to it. Allow to sit, either at room temperature or the fridge, until the mixture as solidified. Use as needed. This should keep for about 6 months to a year, especially if you keep it in the fridge.


Thursday, August 29, 2019

Living the Mother/Father Aspect When You Aren't a Parent

Living the Mother/Father Aspect When You Aren't a Parent

If you haven't read it already, I encourage you to read my article Should We Rethink The Triple Goddess?, which not only applies to our concept of the Triple Goddess but also the Triple God or Holy Trinity if you will. Both consist of three phases; three phases I don't believe work well in witchcraft as you'll find if you read my previous article on the subject. However, no matter how you look at it, whether you support three or four phases, the second is always a parental archetype: Mother and Father.

In today's world, more and more young adults are choosing not to have children. I am one such witch. In fact, I had surgery last year to remove my tubes, making the permanent choice to not birth a child. On discussion boards and forums I come across more and more witches choosing not to have children and wondering how the Mother and Father aspect fit into their lives. Many argue it doesn't, and such gender roles, especially for women, are outdated, rooted in patriarchy, and transphobic. I see where they are coming from. The original concept of the Triple Goddess and the roles of a woman are dated, rooted in patriarchy, and pretty transphobic, but that doesn't mean we have to look at them that way today. Much of what witchcraft practitioners are doing now is fighting gender stereotypes, reclaiming divine power, and throwing patriarchy and toxic masculinity out the window. These are great things we are doing, so why not do the same for the aspects or phases of both women and men?

Here's the thing; despite its history, the Mother and Father aspect have never been solely about childbirth and child-rearing. I know from the outside that's what it looks like. Heck, that's the first thing everyone thinks of when you hear the words "mother" and "father." It isn't wrong to associate children with motherhood and fatherhood, but there is so much more to it than just children. In fact, you can transition into the Mother and Father aspects without ever having children, despite the idea that you have to to fill those roles.

The Mother and Father phases are about actualizing your ego. By this I mean you transition from being self-serving to recognizing your strengths and their ability to help others. For both women and men, the "parental" stage of their life is transitioning their focus from only on themselves to others. They are willing to make sacrifices for the greater good, at least within their own families, if not in their community as well. Furthermore, it is a time for women and men to bring forth creation, but that doesn't necessarily mean life. This is a time when women and men take the dreams of the Maiden and Stag (or Warrior if that's what you prefer) and manifest them into reality. They mean so much more than popping out a couple of screaming kids and raising them for 20 years.

So how can you live this phase without children? Begin by serving and caring for others, whether it be a significant other, your community, or society as a whole. Your actions can be as small as caring for your SO when they are sick, bringing flowers to a grieving neighbor, or picking up trash along the sidewalk or as large as running for public office, joining the Peace Corps, or starting a non-profit, and everything in between. For me, this meant becoming a teacher. Despite not having children of my own, I help raise about 200 every year just by being their science teacher. I make a huge difference in many of these kids lives. I'm a shoulder to cry on, a friend to laugh with, an enforcer of boundaries, and an ear to listen with. If that isn't living the Mother aspect, I don't know what is!

Next, begin manifesting those dreams. As young adults, we often have great plans, but no idea how to implement them. As we grow older, we develop the skills necessary to complete our goals, but often forget to come back to them. Write them down in a journal, BOS, on a sticky note on your mirror, or create a vision board to help remind you that you have a (possibly outlandish) goal your younger Maiden/Stag self wished to accomplish. Transitioning into Mother and Father isn't about growing up and losing your inner spark. It's the exact opposite. The Maiden and Stag teach us the beauty of play; the Mother and Father teach us how to use play to further our lives and the lives of others. Chase those dreams your younger self had. Manifest them into reality.

And finally, bring forth creation through art, music, dance, writing, poetry, and the like. Create beautiful masterpieces without a care for what others may think. Sing like no one can hear you and dance like no one is watching. When you release your inhibitions, you release your soul. This is the true meaning of the Mother and Father aspects.

For those of you currently in Mother/Father without children, how do live the aspect? Please share in the comments below.